In a great set back to the ailing Congress, its general secretory Mr Digvijay Singh has been diagnosed with a serious Mental Problem. In what might be a serious blow to Digvijay’s Prime-Ministerial aspirations- Doctors have officially confirmed that his brain is missing. Mr Anna Hazare ,since last few months, repeatedly urged that Digvijay needed a mental asylum but no body from within the congress paid heed to his requests. Last night out of the blue, Digvijay accused that Mr Anna Hazare had political ambitions and that he was the presidential candidate for the BJP. He went onto challenge Anna to accompany him to mental asylum to get their respective mental conditions checked. Mr Anna Hazare was very prompt to accept this challenge.
Following which both were taken to a well known mental asylum situated at Janpath in the Capital City. While Anna was declared mentally fit, Team of Doctors diagnosing Mr Digvijay Singh were spellbound to discover the fact that Digvijay had no brain. Dr Chautala, the Head Psychiatrist later talking to WakeIndiaNow Correspondents said-“I had never seen such a case in my 20 years of medical history. When we looked at his MRI Scan, We could not believe it. The brain was missing”. Dr Chautala added that doctors could locate some neurons which suggest that the brain existed under that skull some 4-5years back.
While who stole Digvijay’s brain is still unclear. Experts believe it to be part of evolution. Dr Graves said-“We didn’t use our tails for long and finally we no longer have one. Similarly Mr Singh might not have used his brain for years and so it vanished. its but natural part of evolution.” There are not many buyers for this theory though. An FIR has been filed against anonymous thief in the local police station. A cash prize of Rs 5000 will be awarded to anyone who helps locate the missing brain. While Digvijay refused to comment, Congress Spokesperson confirmed that Digvijay would continue as Party’s general secretory till the next assembly elections. He added-“How often do we need to use our brains in politics!!!!”.
Police suspect that this ‘missing Brain’ may be a common problem with several politicians. CBI has been given responsibility of identifying all the politicians whose behavior has been suspicious over the last few months. CBI is keeping a close look at Ms Mayawati, who has been making her own idols and very lately accused Assange of playing into the hands of opposition party by fabricating WikiLeaks against her. Ms Mayawati may be asked to undergo a MRI scan to ascertain the existence of brain. Rahul Gandhi, Raj Thackrey and Kapil Sibal might be the other politicians under CBI’s scanner.
As the suspense over the missing brain gets murkier, rumours are rife that DARPA, USA’s premier defense agency may takeover the Digvijay’s case to study the possibility of existence of human life forms without brain.
Its NOW or NEVER!!